JOKE TIME

While cleaning up an older e-mail, I came across collections forwarded anecdotes, quotations, jokes and what-nots. I forwarded several to some friends and reactions were positive, mostly funny.

Since these e-mails are immortal (time passes but they are still funny, applicable still to our daily lives and full of learning), what better way to preserve it than to put it in the blog.

"The most wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed.Laughter releases one's mind from depression and turns it toward goals, dreams, and triumphs."
- Anonymous
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Some English songs.. syempre pa .. with their tagalog translations

Imagine - Mantakin Mo
Bluer Than Blue - Malapit Na Sa Hukay
Tonight's The Night - Patay Kang Bata Ka
Hey Jude - Hoy Hudas!
Power of Love - Buntis
Three Times a Lady - Super Bakla
More Than A Woman - Tomboy (T-Bird)
Can't Be With You Tonight - Meron Ako Ngayon
Don't Let Me Be The Last To Know - Huwag Mo Kong Gawing Tanga
You Should Know By Now - Alam Mo Na Dapat Ngayon Yan, Tanga!
Sometimes When We Touch - Minsan Kapag Tayo'y Naghihipuan
Touch Me In The Morning - Hipuan Mo Ako Sa Umaga
Stairway To Heaven - Mula Paa Hanggang Singit
Got To Believe In Magic - Walang Himala
Total Eclipse Of The Heart - Maitim ang Puso
King & Queen Of Hearts - Tong-it Na Ko Sa Jack
Wind Beneath My Wings - Hengin Sa Ilelim Ng Eking P_kp_k
Baby One More Time - Isa Pa, Masarap Eh!
Macho Man - Walang Ganyan Sa Opis
Pretty Woman - Walang Pa Ring Ganyan Sa Opis
How Deep Is Your Love - Gaano Kalalim Yang Sayo

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Filipinos' interpretation of some English words (and I really wonder what Webster would say...)

1) Contemplate - kulang ang mga pinggan
2) Punctuation - pera para maka-enrol
3) Ice Buko - nagtatanong kung ayos na ang buhok
4) Tenacious - sapatos na pang tennis
5) Calculator - tawagan kita mamaya
6) Devastation - sakayan ng bus
7) Protestant - Tindahan ng prutas
8) Statue - Ikaw ba yan?
9) Tissue - Ikaw nga!
10) Predicate - Pakawalan mo ang pusa
11) Dedicate - Pinatay ang pusa
12) Aspect - Pantusok o pandurog ng yelo
13) Deduct - Ang pato
14) Defeat - Ang paa (ng pato?)
15) Detail - Ang buntot (ng pato?)
16) Deposit - Gripo (Call DIPLOMA if DEPOSIT is leaking)
17) City - Bago mag-utso; Pagkatapos ng 6
18) Cattle - Doon nakatila ang Hali at Leyna
19) Persuading - Unang Kasal
20) Depress - Ang nagkasal sa PERSUADING
22) Defense - Ginamit ng mga pangsulat sa kontrata sa PERSUADING
23) It Depends - Kainin mo ang bakod
24) Shampoo - Bago mag-labing-isha (11)
25) Delusion - Maluwang (kapag maluwang ang damit, eh DELUSION)
26) Delivery - Walang bayad. "Kapag working lunch, eh DELIVERY na ang tanghalian."
27) Profit - Patunayan mo
28) Balance Sheet - What comes out after eating a balance diet.
29) Backlog - bacon saka egg
30) Beehive - magpakatino ka
31) CD-ROM - tingnan mo ang kwarto
32) Debug - ang ipis
33) Defrag - ang palaka
34) Defense - ang bakod (see also No. 22 hehe)
35) Defer - ang balahibo
36) Deflate - ang plato
37) Detest - ang eksamin
38) Devalue - 'yon ang susunod sa letrang V
39) Devote - ang boto
40) Dilemma - brownout!, a!
41) Effort - 'dun nagla-land ang efflane
42) Forums - apat na kwarto
43) July - nagsinungaling ka ba?
44) Liturgy - what comes after litur F
45) Thesis - ito ay...

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French Class

city- ce vou
drugs- sha vou
goodbye- va vou
bald- cal vou
caught in the act- na vou cou
feathers- valahe vou
not clear- mala vou
sink- lava vou
erap- vou vou

GERMAN LANGUAGE

CHOCOLATE - VAN HAUGHT
BABAE - ALANG HAUGHTEN
BUNTIS - DAHIL SA HAUGHTEN
NAKAPANGANAK NA - BALIK HAUGHTEN